Deceptive or defective eyes

Few days back i was standing on the road side and was waiting for my cab.

There is a signal and a tree near to my pick up point so i go and stand next to the tree to avoid sun rays and heat. i take out my novel and start reading it without looking here and there. when i feel tired i take support of the tree and stand and again eyes in the book. When ants and other things start crawling and biting me then i realise that its rite time for me to move and stand without a support. When i get too tired of reading or when dont feel like reading after few pages then i simply close the book and start wandering here and there.

Thats how i behave/stand on the pickup point. Now one day i reached office and saw a person standing who is in his late thirties and lives in the same locality but comes on his own vehicle. Once he came in my cab and thats how i came to know abt him. So he smiled at me..i also returned the smile. Then he spoke " I saw u standing on the signal...i smiled at u but u turned your face" i started thinking when did i behave this way. Unconciously also i dont act like that. I smile at an enemy also then how come i was so rude to my colleague. Then i asked him " U saw me today? are u sure? what was i doing? i hope u are not mistaken (generally happens)". The person smiled at me and said "yes madame i saw u only..u were looking at the traffic and starring on the vehicles..i was on my bike" I tried to recall but nothing flashed in my garbage store(mind). I was puzzled. He then asked me "everything fine with u?" I managed a smile and said yes..i did not move..and tried hard again but was of no use. Then i realised my bad habbit. I went behind the person and said " Sorry sir, now i realised what i was doing..actually i was tired of reading the book so closed it and kept it in my bag...and when i was standing there i was thinking on various things...when i am engrossed in my thought process i cannot see or understand a single thing happening in front of me. I guess i was looking at u..but back of my mind i was lost in some thought process which made this situation to occur." The person smiled back and said " its ok i did not take it seriously...i wanted to ask u whether u want a lift or something coz u were standing all alone but i got scared of u". Good relief the person did not take it to his heart.

So many times this has happened to me...especially when i am all alone..i see things but i dont actually see them and ppl get the notion that i have ignored them :( worst happens when somebody knows me closely..they wonder what makes me behave this way...they start thinking of the conversation they had with me last..these kind of things actually make them feel that i am angry on them. Hope one day they will realise the defect in me ;) :(