There are 3 kinds of people in this world...those who want things to happen, those that make things happen, and those who just wonder what the hell happened!!!!!
Tragedy hamesha comedy ke roop mein aati hai *
* conditions apply
January 31, 2006
January 19, 2006
Badluck is SEVERLY bad…
Now who will be as unfortunate as me? I shifted from my fav. city to this place just to stay at my home, with my parents. And now dad has got transferred to a place near to delhi which is just 50 kms from Delhi. I can’t think of traveling 50 kms one side. So either I stay in a hostel and see them on weekend or quit my job and stay with them whole day. I guess former is better. So now back to a hostel or PG :( what the hell….why did I come to this place?
And one update…I seriously have no time to draft a mail and send to ppl in my address book to inform abt this…but there is a new virus these days which automatically picks up names and sends pics..subject line generally says “Pictures, Photos, S*xy, funny…and so on” Kindly don’t open that, the pictures will not get downloaded and in turn ur account will get affected.
Thankfully my virus infected mails are going to my close friends from address book…whereas my colleagues infected dirty subject mails are going to seniors and old (70+) ppl and they are asking her to resend in the hope that she has really fwded something watchable (censored)!!!
And one update…I seriously have no time to draft a mail and send to ppl in my address book to inform abt this…but there is a new virus these days which automatically picks up names and sends pics..subject line generally says “Pictures, Photos, S*xy, funny…and so on” Kindly don’t open that, the pictures will not get downloaded and in turn ur account will get affected.
Thankfully my virus infected mails are going to my close friends from address book…whereas my colleagues infected dirty subject mails are going to seniors and old (70+) ppl and they are asking her to resend in the hope that she has really fwded something watchable (censored)!!!
January 12, 2006
The world of Forwards...
If something i would like to change in corporate world then it would be the amount of mails exchanged and those chain mails and forwards which sometimes irritate to the core. Some mails are good with lots of information but others are just crap. I call these people who utilise their productive time in such high yielding activity as Vella.
(Gyan: Vella is a punjabi word for useless/Jobless, used interchangeable. If its with regards to a person then use Jobless and if related to any activity then refer as useless).
Type 1: Goodluck Mails: Send this mail to 7, 10, 50 people and something good will happen in next half an hour. The good is your TL/boss comes and sees u spamming other colleagues and gives u shit loads to handle alone... goodluck tha naa ;) ...
Type 2: Wishing Mail: Read some unfamiliar 4 lines and wish for something. Spread it and u will get the true love. Thankfully it doesnt work otherwise Draupadi would have left miles behind taking my colleague into consideration who is in love with every second guy she sees on the road :P
Type 3: Zodiac mails: A typical girly mail to understand what a sunsign means and what it reflects about your personality. All good things are true and all bad things are false as per a normal human beings reaction. ;)
Type 4: Celebrities Mails: Family Pictures of Cricketers to filmstar to politicians and even Don's Daughter wedding (she was beautiful man!!). Everyone becomes a celebrity and is caught doing each and every act ;). People are so vella that they wont mind capturing them if they go to pee...
Type 5: PJ Series: By god!!! these should be called as SJ (Sucidal Jokes, as my friend reems call them). Reading these i feel like banging the senders head but guess people are lucky beyond limits. :P
Type 6: Pity Mails: Somebody needs blood, somebody is cancer patient, so fwd it and sender/patient gets $1 with every forward. Now these are flown every now and then to test the patience and humanity left in people and believe me most of us Fwd it thinking someone's life is at stake and lets save him/her. Other than time and mailbox everything gets saved. (try to do backward integration and u will find no one ever existed)
Type 7: Cartoons and Office Humours: These are my Fav. I can not think life beyond cartoons ;) but some mails which kept rotating and bored me enugh was famous HUM-TUM series.
Type 8: Funny video Clips: This are light weighted mails forwarded by light headed person to choke the server for next 2 hrs and on the day when u are scared of some offical mail ;). Nothing great inside..some foreign Ads and some Neal and nikkis oops..i mean semi naked ppl.
Type 9: Salary Mails: This one comes on 31st or last day of every month just to remind u that today is the day when u will get the wages for the velli harkatein u have done in the month..
Type 10: Tales: Ancient stuff like a long forgotton love stories or some tragic ends, which one Vella picks from some stupid website...half reads it and then forward to another vella..and the second vella shows his gratitude by fowarding it to the third vella and hence the community grows exponentially.
Type 11: High end delivery mails: Microsoft is sharing its fortune. Fwd this and u will get a million dollar. Bill gates has just gone nuts to distribute its empire in chillars to beggars like u huh? Vella fwds and becomes a millionare and Bill is doing a Laundry (future scene if this becomes true)
Type 12: Low End Delivery Mails: Ups and Downs of a busines, if not a million then our vella are ok with a T-shirt with a printed smiley. Fwd this and u and me get a T-Shirt with a printed smiley. Forget Tshirts u wont get a torned underwear.
The above are some...yes "some" categories of "velli" mails other than those ritual good morning and happy festival mails. I too once was a priveleged member of vella community but over a period of time i realised my mistake and unsubscribed myself. Some of the old vella members are continuing and keeping the heritage and passing it to keep the tradition lightened.
Signing off
X-Velli
P.S: I unsubscribed coz i was threatened by my friends that they will block my mails or kill me if they happen to see me. :(
(Gyan: Vella is a punjabi word for useless/Jobless, used interchangeable. If its with regards to a person then use Jobless and if related to any activity then refer as useless).
Type 1: Goodluck Mails: Send this mail to 7, 10, 50 people and something good will happen in next half an hour. The good is your TL/boss comes and sees u spamming other colleagues and gives u shit loads to handle alone... goodluck tha naa ;) ...
Type 2: Wishing Mail: Read some unfamiliar 4 lines and wish for something. Spread it and u will get the true love. Thankfully it doesnt work otherwise Draupadi would have left miles behind taking my colleague into consideration who is in love with every second guy she sees on the road :P
Type 3: Zodiac mails: A typical girly mail to understand what a sunsign means and what it reflects about your personality. All good things are true and all bad things are false as per a normal human beings reaction. ;)
Type 4: Celebrities Mails: Family Pictures of Cricketers to filmstar to politicians and even Don's Daughter wedding (she was beautiful man!!). Everyone becomes a celebrity and is caught doing each and every act ;). People are so vella that they wont mind capturing them if they go to pee...
Type 5: PJ Series: By god!!! these should be called as SJ (Sucidal Jokes, as my friend reems call them). Reading these i feel like banging the senders head but guess people are lucky beyond limits. :P
Type 6: Pity Mails: Somebody needs blood, somebody is cancer patient, so fwd it and sender/patient gets $1 with every forward. Now these are flown every now and then to test the patience and humanity left in people and believe me most of us Fwd it thinking someone's life is at stake and lets save him/her. Other than time and mailbox everything gets saved. (try to do backward integration and u will find no one ever existed)
Type 7: Cartoons and Office Humours: These are my Fav. I can not think life beyond cartoons ;) but some mails which kept rotating and bored me enugh was famous HUM-TUM series.
Type 8: Funny video Clips: This are light weighted mails forwarded by light headed person to choke the server for next 2 hrs and on the day when u are scared of some offical mail ;). Nothing great inside..some foreign Ads and some Neal and nikkis oops..i mean semi naked ppl.
Type 9: Salary Mails: This one comes on 31st or last day of every month just to remind u that today is the day when u will get the wages for the velli harkatein u have done in the month..
Type 10: Tales: Ancient stuff like a long forgotton love stories or some tragic ends, which one Vella picks from some stupid website...half reads it and then forward to another vella..and the second vella shows his gratitude by fowarding it to the third vella and hence the community grows exponentially.
Type 11: High end delivery mails: Microsoft is sharing its fortune. Fwd this and u will get a million dollar. Bill gates has just gone nuts to distribute its empire in chillars to beggars like u huh? Vella fwds and becomes a millionare and Bill is doing a Laundry (future scene if this becomes true)
Type 12: Low End Delivery Mails: Ups and Downs of a busines, if not a million then our vella are ok with a T-shirt with a printed smiley. Fwd this and u and me get a T-Shirt with a printed smiley. Forget Tshirts u wont get a torned underwear.
The above are some...yes "some" categories of "velli" mails other than those ritual good morning and happy festival mails. I too once was a priveleged member of vella community but over a period of time i realised my mistake and unsubscribed myself. Some of the old vella members are continuing and keeping the heritage and passing it to keep the tradition lightened.
Signing off
X-Velli
P.S: I unsubscribed coz i was threatened by my friends that they will block my mails or kill me if they happen to see me. :(
January 06, 2006
Let your heart fly: Indian Airlines
Feels like writing for a 7 marks question of 10th grade. Indian Airlines condensed as IA is a govt airline. The distance between Kolkatta and Agartala was covered by flight to reduce the travel time. This was my first ever journey in IA. I thought people used to exaggerate about IA but now understood what exactly they went thru. This article might be of some help if u are planning to fly somewhere.
1. Feel at home Factor: Now if you find the airhostess of ur mothers age or to be more precise of ur elder married sister's age then u will call the place a home ;) Other private airlines have better airhostesses with tons and layers of make up.
2. Unbias and considerate: If IA serve any candy other than Alpenlibe, then people may find the discrimination being done, so to avoid any discrepancy they serve only one candy. How appreciable. And see these jet guys..keeping almost 10 varients and flavor of candies and making passenger confused as which one to select.
3. No pretentious behavior: Thats one good thing about IA. If they dont like ur face then they will not bore u with those plastic smiles and sugar coated words. If they find u ugly their face will say it all.
4. Bringing the people closer: IA is always ahead in such measures. They will remind u that there were people before u and will come after u in the same plane and the national integartion will continue as usual. Dont believe it? Ok next time u board IA just open the snacks/ food holder and u can see Guptaji's leftover still there. some sauce and some oil stains to remind u that Punjab(sauce) and Tripura (oil) arent far off.
5. Changing the mindset: These Jet and other flights put a tissue sheet on the seat (beneath ur head) to absorb all the oil/dandruff/shampoo of one's hair to stop getting it transmitted to someone else. But IA believes in Equality of rights. U never know if sharmaji's chameli ka tel can do wonders and you might get some extra brain/memory power by rubbing your head against the seat or Bipasha's danddruff may remove the excessive unwanted hairgrowth in you. Who knows!!!
6. Atithi Devo Bhav: Now, since u have boarded the flight and as per the custom IA has to serve, they will get the best possible scattered items from the menu. Why to give u something expected. After all there is a word called "surprise" in the dictionary. So the USP is all scattered and unimaginable food items for a joy ride.
7. Adhering to the tradition: Why to serve water in small plastic bottles..after all plastics are not good for health, hence a small size recyclable paper cup. Now there is a catch, this actually shows how to get intimate with customers. While serving the water obviously they will sprinkle some on u and ur neighbours and by that u have to leave ur "Maun-awastha" and ask for a tissue paper. They dont want u to be quite coz in case sitting quitely leads to glueing of lips then they might not find a doc in airline to resolve the issue :P high time conspiracy ;)
8. Discarding the hospitality and coming to reality concept: Now everything has got a limit. These flying queens too are human. They too feel irritated attimes with their job and personal life and we should understand this. So what if they give you "eat-you-morons" look while serving. Lets be real and accpet them the way they are.
9: Six sigma and Quality Gyan: Food quality or service quality? which one to explain first? Both are recommendable. My Potbelly groaned with the yummy food and kidney just stopped working after the heavnly food churns touched it. 50 minutes notice was what i could get from my kidney (that was fly time as did not want to take a chance of experience a flying loo)
10. Branding, marketing, and positionting: i guess too many marketing concepts being a mgt student but cant help it. So now lets take a look at the resources inside.
Magzines: vowww a book on india with some pages folded as if it was lying in the library and reffered some 20 times.
Air Sickness bag: I could not find any. May be they have a different mode..may be a Bowl? (reminded me of Santa's disgusting joke)
Overall an exciting 50 minutes flying with so many new things to learn. And last but not the least the taglines which i found on my air tickets..
(i) Let your heart fly:
(my heart would have surely comeout and floated in bangladesh had it been a 2 hrs flight)
(ii) Fly smart, fly IA:
(well i am just blank to comment on this now)
Happy Flying.. if u happen to survive after the journey just lemme know
1. Feel at home Factor: Now if you find the airhostess of ur mothers age or to be more precise of ur elder married sister's age then u will call the place a home ;) Other private airlines have better airhostesses with tons and layers of make up.
2. Unbias and considerate: If IA serve any candy other than Alpenlibe, then people may find the discrimination being done, so to avoid any discrepancy they serve only one candy. How appreciable. And see these jet guys..keeping almost 10 varients and flavor of candies and making passenger confused as which one to select.
3. No pretentious behavior: Thats one good thing about IA. If they dont like ur face then they will not bore u with those plastic smiles and sugar coated words. If they find u ugly their face will say it all.
4. Bringing the people closer: IA is always ahead in such measures. They will remind u that there were people before u and will come after u in the same plane and the national integartion will continue as usual. Dont believe it? Ok next time u board IA just open the snacks/ food holder and u can see Guptaji's leftover still there. some sauce and some oil stains to remind u that Punjab(sauce) and Tripura (oil) arent far off.
5. Changing the mindset: These Jet and other flights put a tissue sheet on the seat (beneath ur head) to absorb all the oil/dandruff/shampoo of one's hair to stop getting it transmitted to someone else. But IA believes in Equality of rights. U never know if sharmaji's chameli ka tel can do wonders and you might get some extra brain/memory power by rubbing your head against the seat or Bipasha's danddruff may remove the excessive unwanted hairgrowth in you. Who knows!!!
6. Atithi Devo Bhav: Now, since u have boarded the flight and as per the custom IA has to serve, they will get the best possible scattered items from the menu. Why to give u something expected. After all there is a word called "surprise" in the dictionary. So the USP is all scattered and unimaginable food items for a joy ride.
7. Adhering to the tradition: Why to serve water in small plastic bottles..after all plastics are not good for health, hence a small size recyclable paper cup. Now there is a catch, this actually shows how to get intimate with customers. While serving the water obviously they will sprinkle some on u and ur neighbours and by that u have to leave ur "Maun-awastha" and ask for a tissue paper. They dont want u to be quite coz in case sitting quitely leads to glueing of lips then they might not find a doc in airline to resolve the issue :P high time conspiracy ;)
8. Discarding the hospitality and coming to reality concept: Now everything has got a limit. These flying queens too are human. They too feel irritated attimes with their job and personal life and we should understand this. So what if they give you "eat-you-morons" look while serving. Lets be real and accpet them the way they are.
9: Six sigma and Quality Gyan: Food quality or service quality? which one to explain first? Both are recommendable. My Potbelly groaned with the yummy food and kidney just stopped working after the heavnly food churns touched it. 50 minutes notice was what i could get from my kidney (that was fly time as did not want to take a chance of experience a flying loo)
10. Branding, marketing, and positionting: i guess too many marketing concepts being a mgt student but cant help it. So now lets take a look at the resources inside.
Magzines: vowww a book on india with some pages folded as if it was lying in the library and reffered some 20 times.
Air Sickness bag: I could not find any. May be they have a different mode..may be a Bowl? (reminded me of Santa's disgusting joke)
Overall an exciting 50 minutes flying with so many new things to learn. And last but not the least the taglines which i found on my air tickets..
(i) Let your heart fly:
(my heart would have surely comeout and floated in bangladesh had it been a 2 hrs flight)
(ii) Fly smart, fly IA:
(well i am just blank to comment on this now)
Happy Flying.. if u happen to survive after the journey just lemme know
I wish i did the same
But integration was not all that bad.
I am planning to go to my school tomorrow...feeling little depressed...i guess schoollife was best :(
January 05, 2006
January 02, 2006
Book Review: Da Vinci Code
I want to write abt my trip..but will write later....first let me tell u abt the book i read and found good...To be frank it was my fourth attempt to read this book..first 3 pushed me for first 30 pages and i gave up considering the font size, the old names of the characters and high funda christanity...a simple OHT (Over Head Transmission)...But before leaving for Tripura, I packed it in a hope that this time i will read and yes i did it...i completed the book and its awesome..
After crosing first 100 pages i realised that the book has got a nice suspense and a very good plot. Appreciated the way Dan Brown can arouse a soul. Lots and Lots of gyan on Christanity. I dont know how Christans are reacting over it. To admit something, i wasnt aware of things like Holy Grail, the last supper, cryptography etc.
A must read.
I bought O' Henery's collection with 200 short stories covered from College street, Kolkatta. Reading it these days. The story " Gift of magi" was a cute and loveable one.
Wish you all a very Happy and Prosperous new year.
After crosing first 100 pages i realised that the book has got a nice suspense and a very good plot. Appreciated the way Dan Brown can arouse a soul. Lots and Lots of gyan on Christanity. I dont know how Christans are reacting over it. To admit something, i wasnt aware of things like Holy Grail, the last supper, cryptography etc.
A must read.
I bought O' Henery's collection with 200 short stories covered from College street, Kolkatta. Reading it these days. The story " Gift of magi" was a cute and loveable one.
Wish you all a very Happy and Prosperous new year.
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