The world of Forwards...

If something i would like to change in corporate world then it would be the amount of mails exchanged and those chain mails and forwards which sometimes irritate to the core. Some mails are good with lots of information but others are just crap. I call these people who utilise their productive time in such high yielding activity as Vella.

(Gyan: Vella is a punjabi word for useless/Jobless, used interchangeable. If its with regards to a person then use Jobless and if related to any activity then refer as useless).

Type 1: Goodluck Mails: Send this mail to 7, 10, 50 people and something good will happen in next half an hour. The good is your TL/boss comes and sees u spamming other colleagues and gives u shit loads to handle alone... goodluck tha naa ;) ...

Type 2: Wishing Mail: Read some unfamiliar 4 lines and wish for something. Spread it and u will get the true love. Thankfully it doesnt work otherwise Draupadi would have left miles behind taking my colleague into consideration who is in love with every second guy she sees on the road :P

Type 3: Zodiac mails: A typical girly mail to understand what a sunsign means and what it reflects about your personality. All good things are true and all bad things are false as per a normal human beings reaction. ;)

Type 4: Celebrities Mails: Family Pictures of Cricketers to filmstar to politicians and even Don's Daughter wedding (she was beautiful man!!). Everyone becomes a celebrity and is caught doing each and every act ;). People are so vella that they wont mind capturing them if they go to pee...

Type 5: PJ Series: By god!!! these should be called as SJ (Sucidal Jokes, as my friend reems call them). Reading these i feel like banging the senders head but guess people are lucky beyond limits. :P

Type 6: Pity Mails: Somebody needs blood, somebody is cancer patient, so fwd it and sender/patient gets $1 with every forward. Now these are flown every now and then to test the patience and humanity left in people and believe me most of us Fwd it thinking someone's life is at stake and lets save him/her. Other than time and mailbox everything gets saved. (try to do backward integration and u will find no one ever existed)

Type 7: Cartoons and Office Humours: These are my Fav. I can not think life beyond cartoons ;) but some mails which kept rotating and bored me enugh was famous HUM-TUM series.

Type 8: Funny video Clips: This are light weighted mails forwarded by light headed person to choke the server for next 2 hrs and on the day when u are scared of some offical mail ;). Nothing great inside..some foreign Ads and some Neal and nikkis oops..i mean semi naked ppl.

Type 9: Salary Mails: This one comes on 31st or last day of every month just to remind u that today is the day when u will get the wages for the velli harkatein u have done in the month..

Type 10: Tales: Ancient stuff like a long forgotton love stories or some tragic ends, which one Vella picks from some stupid website...half reads it and then forward to another vella..and the second vella shows his gratitude by fowarding it to the third vella and hence the community grows exponentially.

Type 11: High end delivery mails: Microsoft is sharing its fortune. Fwd this and u will get a million dollar. Bill gates has just gone nuts to distribute its empire in chillars to beggars like u huh? Vella fwds and becomes a millionare and Bill is doing a Laundry (future scene if this becomes true)

Type 12: Low End Delivery Mails: Ups and Downs of a busines, if not a million then our vella are ok with a T-shirt with a printed smiley. Fwd this and u and me get a T-Shirt with a printed smiley. Forget Tshirts u wont get a torned underwear.

The above are some...yes "some" categories of "velli" mails other than those ritual good morning and happy festival mails. I too once was a priveleged member of vella community but over a period of time i realised my mistake and unsubscribed myself. Some of the old vella members are continuing and keeping the heritage and passing it to keep the tradition lightened.

Signing off

X-Velli

P.S: I unsubscribed coz i was threatened by my friends that they will block my mails or kill me if they happen to see me. :(