July 16, 2005

Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.

"You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. "

Well by no means i am going to start a topic on love-shove (typical punjabi sa-tayil). well i am forced to think as what can i do in free time which i may get in near future ;) No i did not say that i was too busy talking to nerds and mailing jerks...I was hmmm... i actually dont remember how i spent my week. I dont think i was on anesthisia..and suffered no memory loss...i need to ask myself "main kahan hoon".

Uff the memory loss of Hindi movie is something which makes me laugh. Every actor/actress meeting an accident has to undergo a memory loss and a state of unconciousness for couple of days...forcing other members of hindi movie family to pray in a typical filmistan mandir...with the same staircase and same pooja ki thali..but yes subject to believe in God. Ending up with a big prayer cum song and camera side by side showing an operation of the person who met with an accident. God isnt too hard on actors...he has to spare them after all we all prefer happy ending and paisa vasooli of our cinema tickets. (i have never seen a villan suffering a memory loss...can any director answer me why?)

God after a short while comes into an action. All this while, he just want to listen to they type of songs the person offer in the standard temple and the type of offer they make (god doesnt believe in materialistic offers)...some come bare foot in the hot son..some with bleeding knees..climbing the stairs without using foot and some with full sexy makeup and glycerine in eyes...some ofcourse with the rage of the accident and demanding their partners life and telling all the gloomy dark future they can see ahead without him/her and then finally threatening God by committing sucide (main apni jaan de doongi types) ...uff so many types of prayers and offerings...Poor god has to make a decision fast for his peace..otherwise the automatically ringing bells of temple with the wind or shall i say whirlpool, will make the heaven burst and fall into peices...with all this hurricane entering into his domain..oops heaven, he decides to work faster and as a gesture he throws a flower kept on his idol in the temple. Whole day if the flowers fall nobody notices, not even pujaari but while singing the prayer they keep their eyes open for capturing that flower falling. Big hopes from god u know!!!

A sigh of relieve!!! end of that torturing song to God with a loud voice and tan tana tan hanging bells...the person gets conciousness back...aahh now seems like a happy ending...

Now coming to a situation where there is a love triangle...or an extra actress (debut) with someones approach to director...poor director cant offer two lady with one gentle man... against our laws u see...so where to send one?? cant afford another actor as the budget is already high and finding one more debut will spoil the fun..so he has to kill one of the two...obviously the one who worship the hero like mera will get killed..though we do kill radha for a change ;) Now the bullet hits the extra in the stomach and blood spurs out like a fountain...ruining her light color dress with a red stain...(pls note that the dress wud always be light in color when the person is shot)...finally taking the last breath...her eyes will wait for the actors last look...he wud be fighting with some villan in remote...but as soon as he sees her conditon..he will speed his process of killing/fighting fast and runs back to her just to say pyara wala good bye....she all this while holds her life not letting yamraj to take her away...After the hero comes and holds her hand..she will look into his eyes and wish him and the other one good luck and a happy married life...and ask for some stupid promise..say pls doosri waali ko khush rakhna types...uffffffff she still is living..what left for her to chat?? she comes up with all names in the movie and tells him to take care of them too..gosh she is still alive...now she wanders and looks up in the sky..asking the director to call her dead....and finally she will start a line and without completing will sleep forever in his arms....with eyes open ofcourse....poor actor has to close it...no extra money given for this task to him :p...and the scene ends up with a photo of late heroine in the heros house with a fresh garland....they lived happily there after...

But ever wondered these situation in ekta kapoor serials. I admire her for making fun of all the possible ladies and influencing them to become like "Tulasi" and "Parvati" of every house. But i fail to understand her stories...each and every person is in love...marrying someone else...finally the "love never ends in the heart" and they go back to first one...the whole confusion revolves with all the characters...and each character ends up marrying 4-5 times...good deal...variety is spice of life ;) and extra marital affairs are spicy stuff in all her serial...i guess inspired by Shobha De...soups of all relationships...

The best part of the "K" factor serials is the plastic surgeries...so many of them go for plastic surgery...and i believe that they go for a package deal...like they go for changing their face and end up with modification/editing of height, breadth, width..and all possible dimensions...i am not into a medical stream but wonder if this new concept can really work ;) Innovative..very innovatie lady this is :) Hats off to u chubby babe...

I have not watched these serials with interest but the crux of all the K serials is same..confuse people and they will watch more...u know suspense...and how we love it...but then if indian janta like suspense then why the detective serials are not doing well...i see a very less viewership for CID...

Now in a nutshell i wanted to know that how do i spend my sunday..and see the agony i am going thru..."K"ekta..pls forgive me dear...seems like we committed some sins and god is not willing to forgive..how long are we going to watch the sas-bahu and kahaniyaan ghar ghar ki...the long journey with u was quite fascinating..where u actually made ppl cry on a character's death..but dont u think u have changed the same character 5 times and ppl are confused when u show the flash back ;)

"Every day, man is making bigger and better fool-proof things, and every day, nature is making bigger and better fools. So far, I think nature is winning. "

Pls leave some space for some better shows...already dd1 sucks and have started following ur footprints with those unidentified wamps...i liked ur idea of wamps in each house...u are a born genious...u have supernatural powers...u can do anything...


I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

6 comments:

Santosh said...

I have only one line for K(e)Kta kapoor.. Khoon Pi Jaaoonga tera.. her serials have been constant headache for me. my mother being an ardent fan of her "Epics" I have to bear with the gibberish coming out of my tv set the only solution was either use my walky of full volume or just walk out of the house..

sameer said...

i will advise youto try cartoon network its characters are more consistent and storylines are more interesting :)

Anonymous said...

ha ha.bitiya daaru pee rakhee hai kya.but nice funny post.waise in that mandir stunt , people hit thir heads against the mail bell in the temple.makes the hero come back to life faster.

Enchantica said...

Santosh: Ahh i feel i am better..coz my mom doesnt watch these serials..she just watch CNBC...rest of the time we keep out TV set OFF..thanks to kekta

sameer: Well i used to watch cartoon network...and fond of Tom and Jerry and try to catch it at 10 but sometime miss coz of hectic days torture...thanks 4 the visit

Abhi: Uncle i can imagine ur situation after reading the post ;) pagal yeh daru waaru ki baatein post per nahin karte...meet me in tantra at 8..he he

Anonymous said...

oh to tantra tak reach hai teree.n 8 ko urmila ke saath fixed hai , fir 12 baje kajol keh rahee thee n 3 baje ke baad to mallika mujhe jaane nahee degee.tu ghar pe reh n mother dairy ka dudu pee munni.;)

Anonymous said...

kuch jyada lamba post ho gaya ships, wo bhi ekta-kapoor and her saas-bahu.... i have never seen any of her creativities but have heard some views and i see many other important things in life to utilise my time than to even think abt them, he he :-)

-CH